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"Warning: Not for human consumption" -Triops Fish Food

"Do not consume" - Home Depot Treated Lumber

"To prevent possible injury, do not apply the hose or the lid sealer to any part of the body while vacuum pump is in operation." - Foodsealer (Vacuum seals foods)

"Do not return used condoms to the manufacturer through the mail." - Ansell Condoms

"Warning: Not for Human Consumption" - Bloodworms (frozen red mosquito larvae sold as food for tropical fish)

"Warning! Improper packing of this parachute may result in serious injury or death to the user!!" - Unknown Parachute

"Suitable for outdoor use." - Unknown Rain Gauge

"Avoid Collision" - On back of barge at Portsmouth Naval Shipyard, NH

"Keeps doors open!" - Waxman Soft Touch Doorstops

"This bag is not a toy." - Unknown Bag

 

"This bag contains forest products." - Unknown Pine Bark Mulch

"For indoor use only." - Christmas Star – Outdoor Icicle Lights

"Warning: Do not ignite in face." -Zippo Lighter

"Caution: Never aim spray at your own eyes." - Unknown Pepper Spray

"Keep out of children." - Unknown Korean Kitchen Knife

"Warning: Do not drive with sunshade in place. Remove from windshield before starting ignition." - Auto-Shade Windshield Visor

"WARNING: Pucks, hockey sticks, balls, bats, racquets, and other objects flying into spectator area can cause serious injury." - General Admission Ticket to Unknown Hockey Game

"Do not ingest." - Unknown Lava Lamp

"Do not put boiling water or more than 10% alcohol in this cup." - Unknown Glass Cup

"WARNING: Do not weld can to rim." - Fix-a-Flat

"All divers must land in water!" - Unknown Diving Board

"Warning: For indoor or outdoor use only." - Unknown Christmas Lights

"Ignite lighter away from face." - Bic Lighter

"This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark" - Komatsu Floodlight

"Caution: Non-Flamable" - Unknown Fire Extinguisher

"These ear plugs are nontoxic, but may interfere with breathing if caught in windpipe. - Ear Plugs

"If swallowed, promptly see doctor" - Energizer AAA 4 Pack

"Caution: this tool will cut." - Machettee

"Parents! The door handle can be opened by small children" - Summerfield Suites – Near Door

"Caution: Contents may catch fire." - Unknown Matches

"Description reads “WARNING – May cause cancer in California”" - Roll-A-Hose

"Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover." - On a pair of shin guards made for bicyclists.

"Do not drive with sunshield in place." - On a cardboard sunshield that keeps the sun off the dashboard.

"Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." - On an "Aim-n-Flame" fireplace lighter.

This is NOT a life saving device!!! - On a life saving device

“Additional purchase idea’s: rocks, aquatic plant life, fish” - Wal-Mart Fish Tank

"May irritate eyes." - On a can of self-defense pepper spray.

"Eating rocks may lead to broken teeth." - On a novelty rock garden set called "Popcorn Rock."

"Please keep out of children." - ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE.

"Not suitable for children aged 36 months or less." - On a birthday card for a 1 year old.

"Do not recharge, put in backwards, or use." - On a battery.

"Caution: Do not swallow contents." - Stadium Football

"Warning: Remove tape before using car seat." - Cosco Car Seat with Instructional Video

"Warning: Do not use on eyes." - In the manual for a heated seat cushion.

"Do not look into laser with remaining eye." - On a laser pointer.

"For use on animals only." - On an electric cattle prod.

"Use for sex only – not to be eaten" - Trojan Condoms

"Remember, objects in the mirror are actually behind you." - On a motorcycle helmet-mounted rear-view mirror.

"Warning: Do not climb inside this bag and zip it up. Doing so will cause injury and death." - A label inside a protective bag (for fragile objects), which measures 15cm by 15cm by 12cm.

"Warning: knives are sharp!" - On the packaging of a sharpening stone.

"Do not use near fire, flame, or sparks." -Scripto “Aim ‘n Flame” Butane Lighter

"Fragile. Do not drop." - Posted on a Boeing 757.

"Cannot be made non-poisonous." - On the back of a can of de-icing windshield fluid.

"Caution: Remove infant before folding for storage." - On a portable stroller.

"Look before driving." - On the dash board of a mail truck.

"For indoor or outdoor use only." - ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS.

"Beware! To touch these wires is instant death. Anyone found doing so will be prosecuted." - On a sign at a railroad station.

"Safe for use around pets." - On a box of Arm & Hammer Cat Litter.

"Do not light in face. Do not expose to flame." - On a lighter.

"Do not eat if seal is missing." - On said seal.

"Warning: Misuse may cause injury or death." - Stamped on the metal barrel of a .22 calibre rifle.

"Not to be used as a personal flotation device." - On a 6x10 inch inflatable picture frame.

"For lifting purposes only." - On the box for a car jack.

"Do not use house paint on face." - In a Visa commercial that depicts an expecting couple looking for paint at a hardware store.

"Do not drive cars in ocean." - In a car commercial which shows a car in the ocean.

"Always drive on roads. Not on people." - From a car commercial which shows a vehicle "body-surfing" at a concert.

"For a limited time only." - From a Rally's commercial that described how their burgers were fresh.


Comments   

0 #27 Guest 2014-01-29 16:27
Which :lol: :D bag is not a toy
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0 #26 Guest 2014-01-29 16:24
Hi
:D :-)
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0 #25 Guest 2012-07-07 16:56
not all grandparents wear false teeth. :sad: these are hilarious. :D :lol: :-)
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0 #24 la 2011-10-31 22:44
I recently bought a guy friend a ball cap made from Hemp & the label read " Do not smoke this hat"
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0 #23 Kaitlyn 2011-03-09 01:53
"Made in America. Parts from Japan. Assembled in Mexico." - Fender Guitar

and

"Caution: Risk of fire." - Pine Mountain Fire Logs

LOL! :lol:
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0 #22 jonos 2009-11-25 04:04
:woohoo: you guys crack me up, if thats possible he he :evil:
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0 #21 hiliary 2009-09-10 23:05
on midol packages it says not to use if you have an enlarged prostate :P
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0 #20 Guest 2009-07-07 11:46
Класс! Афтару респект!
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0 #19 jessica 2009-06-14 15:50
lol... these are funny!
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0 #18 Cassandra 2009-06-11 20:01
Quoting Marcuss:
LOL. What about this "-)o not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals." or On a Japanese food processor -- "Not to be used for the other use."

And now Im wondering what the \'other use\' is!
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